In a stunning blow to SteamPunk aficionados worldwide, the World Organization of Fetishes (W.O.O.F) has deemed Steampunk “not a fetish.”
Reached for comment, WOOF press officer Sven Pongkler simply stated “it’s more a fad than a fetish.” Added Pongkler; “let’s face it. It’s not even that hard to come up with something original. I just put on my grandfathers golfing knickerbockers, an odd pair of shoes, a flat cap I got from a local discount store for less than the price of a Starbucks coffee, strapped some old Ford Fiesta parts to my shirt and duck-taped a magnifying glass to my forehead. It took me 8 minutes to come up with the idea.”
I interviewed a couple at a local fetish club, who were obviously into the fashion.
Tim Pendon, who goes by ‘Lord Flanderspout’ was adamant. “Of course it’s a fetish. I LOOK different, and I ACT differently, so isn’t that what fetish means? I had to get three old non working watches, two feet of sprinkler pipe, a rubber band and some goodwill clothes to look this good. It took me almost an hour to come up with this costume. It’s a way of life for me. For at least two hours a week, I dress to impress. Next week I’m going with an old toilet seat, the hose from a leaf blower and a six foot stovepipe hat. I dare you to call that NOT a fetish”
When I pointed out he’s perhaps just a walking dumpster, Pendon simply looked
puzzled.
Photo credit: Bart CC: NC
